Let me tell you something — The Real Housewives of Atlanta did NOT come to play this season. Episode one? Oh, we are outside, activated, and already a little toxic. Just how I like it.
First of all, that intro with Cynthia Bailey? Mysterious, cinematic, giving “I know something y’all don’t know.” I loved every second. Welcome back, bone collector energy.
Now let’s get into Angela. Baby…body is TEA. I’m talking statuesque, sun dress, giving grown woman. But I gotta read you real quick — that dry ass burger plate? Chips and watermelon chunks? Oh no ma’am. Where was the baked beans? The potato salad spilling over the edge? That plate was LOW VIBRATIONAL. We don’t do that here.
And this relationship… chile. I’m watching with one eye open. Maybe it’s their kink, because I’m confused.
Then boom — Porsha Williams bridges the gap and brings in K. Michelle. And I’m nervous. Because every time Porsha brings someone into the group, it ends in chaos. I WANT THIS TO LAST. Please.
But let me say this — K. Michelle? She fits. I was a little skeptical at first, but looking at how reality TV has evolved, she’s right where she needs to be. And she’s married, so that already adds a different layer. I’m here for it. Just sis…stop looking at the camera. The fourth wall is not your friend right now.
Now Porsha… divorce FINAL and she ready to be OUTSIDE. And I love outside Porsha. She feels like a good time and a bad decision all in one. Dangerous combo.
K talking about proving bitches wrong? Whew. I felt that. I used to live there — doing the most just to prove a point, and it gets you nowhere. That’s that Pisces energy. I hope she grows out of that.
Somewhere along the way, Kelli and Shamea became besties and I KNOW production was working overtime to make that make sense… but I’m not mad. Because Shamea? TV GOLD. That miming scene? GIVE HER AN EMMY.
And can we take a moment for Shamea’s house?
Silence.
Because GAH-DAMN.
Also, shoutout to Kelli being a college mom — you can tell she’s solid. She’s growing on me, I’m not even gonna lie.
Then we get Cynthia again… with a VOODOO DOLL??? Girl…why. Why are we doing this? And all these virtual dates?? Immediate ick. What happens if your phone dies? Be serious.
Now let’s talk about Phaedra Parks — BABY SHE LOOKS DELICIOUS. Whoever did that wig? Give them a raise immediately. No notes.
Drew… I’m side-eyeing you. You kinda started that shade first, so be careful poking Kimberly. You know how this goes.
And Porsha inviting that big bald man?? GIRL RUN. I’ve done it before — invited the wrong man into the wrong space — and it NEVER ends well. Learn from me!
Also, shoutout to Pinky Cole — Slutty Vegan is THAT GIRL. I have her book and listen… life-changing. She’s about to have a TIME on this show.
Then the chaos hits.
Drew brings the Zoom date energy and Shamea clocked it immediately. I would’ve shut up after the first “Zoom date” comment, but no… she kept going. And that’s when things went left.
Because you KNOW we can’t have Housewives without confrontation.
And then BOOM — Phaedra pulls the receipts. Or… does she? Because it went from “I saw it” to “I had it reviewed” real quick. Shady Phae Phae is BACK and honestly? Good for her.
And let’s give K. Michelle her flowers for walking away instead of turning up. That’s growth. We love to see it.
Also… Porsha admitting she was dating while with Simon?
Girl… you smart. He had multiple wives — you did NOTHING wrong.
Overall? This episode ate.
Drama, humor, chaos, growth — all of it.
We are in for a SEASON.
Watch the FULL EPISODE HERE & Catch new episodes of The Real Housewives of Atlanta on Bravo Every Sunday and the next Day on Peacock!
Next Week…
Porsha steps out with a girlfriend 👀
And K. Michelle gets caught in the middle of Porsha and Kelli’s mess…
Now let me ask YOU —
What do you want to see happen this season?
Follow me: @whoisjaylaroxx on ALL PLATFORMS
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